There have been a lot of surprising things about 2020…and that, my friends, is the finest
understatement of the year.

But perhaps we can all agree that a horse named Authentic winning
the 2020 Kentucky Derby couldn’t be more fitting. We strive towards authenticity in our daily
lives. With the great pause the pandemic has offered us, and the forced introspection which has
accompanied it, we are able to better examine our insides and what makes us who we are. Lately
we’ve had some extra time to reflect on ourselves, and what better time to ponder who we really
want to be.

We focus a lot on our exterior; on nutrition and diet, exercise, beauty and skincare, and these
are all important things, integral to our overall health. But equally important is a focus on our
wellness from within. How we feel on the inside makes a direct impact on our ability to project
confidence on the outside.

I choose to surround myself with inspiring women. Many among us are mothers who encourage
their children to be curious and never stop learning. I love that so many women have begun new
and interesting things at different stages of their life. Whether it’s becoming yoga-certified,
taking up guitar, getting fluent in Spanish, going back to school or deciding to cook vegan – I’m
inspired by my friends who are exploring the depths of their ability and reaching for new
heights.

Empowering other women is a way of leading by example.

As is the case with any team, we succeed best when we work together. But lifting each other up
doesn’t always come easy to women. I’ve had some wonderful female managers, but I’ve also
had some that felt threatened. Women shouldn’t feel a sense of competition with one another
unless they’re literally on a playing field. It’s hard enough to have the inequities of an overly
male-driven society, without us not being able to fully support one another.
We can do more together than we could ever do alone. Throughout history, women banded
together to make the most happen. Think back to the suffragette movement, the fight for Title
IX, the MeToo movement, what women have done to speak up for rights – it’s in our best
interest to succeed as a team.

Even girl bands are a little cooler, am I right? From Bananarama
to The Bangles, The Spice Girls to The Supremes. Girls make other girls better.
We want to feel strong on the inside and confident on the outside. It’s a partnership. One
woman making others feel better is portrait photographer Sarah Hinchey. Her commitment to
authenticity allows your personality to shine beyond the dimensions of a photograph. A
professional headshot can remind you of your own personal power and bring a renewed sense of
self-confidence.

And what have we learned from the strongest, most confident women leaders? When Ruth
Bader Ginsburg banged her last gavel, I was reassured by the poetry of Maya Angelou’s “When
Great Trees Fall.” I’ve discovered it’s women who consistently comfort me during this time. We
are united in power and share a common, yet defining, female emotion of empathy.

Melinda Gates says: “A woman with a voice is by definition a strong woman. But the search to
find that voice can be remarkably difficult.” We need other women to help us be heard. Kamala
Harris told us: “Dream with ambition and lead with conviction.” Let’s lift each other up and
propel ourselves forward into 2021 with a renewed focus on teamwork. On leading by lifting.
And perhaps at this year’s Kentucky Derby, a horse named Run Baby Girl will
win, you just never know. RBG, we thank you.

To learn more about the Creative Confidant, please visit online and be sure to follow along on social media for all of the latest information, upcoming workshops, inspirational messages and local appearances.

Professional cover image headshot by Sarah Hinchey Photography. Sarah’s mission is to build self-love and self-value in every single person who walks into her studio. Sarah specializes in creating an empowering portrait experience.

I saw this post at the beginning of Covid and thought it was just another funny meme. But as the pandemic wore on, I started to take it a little more seriously. I was telling a good friend how I was feeling a bit down and lethargic lately. She immediately replied, “you get energy from other people and you are not getting that right now.” Like most people, I am not strictly an extrovert or an introvert, more a blend of both. I love socializing but I also love my “Netflix & chill” time. But I know that socializing with other people (in person) gives me energy and I am missing that. If you are feeling low energy levels, this could be one of the reasons.

I received a text the other day from a new friend whom I had met doing an online course together. We decided to take a walk on Nantasket beach. The minute I saw her in person her joyful energy radiated through me. We decided to walk right on the sand for a more grounded experience while the sound of the waves massaged our brains. It was at this point that it clicked for me. I have been missing the energy flow that you get from in-person interaction. It struck me that this is why zooming is so tiring. You are giving out your energy to the screen and not receiving anything back. Covid has made getting together with friends very difficult. But there are creative ways to help you cope. Walking outdoors with a friend, can be a safe, socially distant activity that still allows for the transfer and sharing of energy. Whether it is at the beach or in the woods, spending time in nature with another person offers immense benefits.

Plan inspiring daytrips with your spouse or a friend. My husband and I drove to Walden Pond this week and soaked in the vibes of Henry David Thoreau. “Live in each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influence of the earth.”

We immersed ourselves in history, strolling the Minuteman trail and discussing the battles that led to the American Revolution. Somehow reliving moments from the past and realizing the tragedies and challenges they overcame made me realize that coronavirus is just one of the many challenges we have faced as a society and will triumph over once again.

Listen to your body and your soul. Exercise if you feel the need or rest if that seems better for your body right now. If you are missing in-person interaction try a socially distant walk or a daytrip to soothe your soul. We are all going through similar struggles but we each handle those struggles in different ways. Reach out to your (introvert and extrovert) friends. Make an effort to get outside, change up your daily routine. We will get through this together.

Minute Man National Park Info

Anyone stressed?

Whoa, I just felt all of the hands whoosh up into the air. Life lately has been anything but stress-free. For me personally, my bucketful of self-care items are getting dusty simply because of the lack of time, and yet I know that I’d benefit from using them more now than perhaps ever before. And we know stress is bad for us, which stresses me out even more, and I find myself needing to get off this self-propagated stress rollercoaster!

Cue…. deep breaths. We’ve all heard the age old saying TAKE A DEEP BREATH! But all breaths are not created equal. And in times of deep stress, I’d urge you to try a breath exercise that has a longer EXHALE than INHALE. Why? It is scientifically proven that breathing this way activates our parasympathetic nervous system and quiets our sympathetic nervous system.

Our sympathetic nerves control our fight-or-flight system, causing our heart rates and breathing to elevate and stress hormones like cortisol to be released. This is super useful when we are face-to-face with a real threat, like being chased by a Siberian Tiger, for example, but less than helpful, and even damaging, when the threat is of the “when is this pandemic going to end?!/ how do I quiet my children?!/ who will win the next election?!” varieties. In fact, too much fight-or-flight response can damage the delicate balance of hormones in your body and lower your immune system.

Our parasympathetic nerves control our rest, relax, and digest responses. When we activate our parasympathetic nervous system, our heart rate and blood pressure lowers, our breathing slows, and we feel more calm and are better able to heal. Who needs more of this? (There go those whooshing raised hands again.)

The easiest way to go parasympathetic is to inhale for a slightly shorter amount of time than exhale. For example, my go-to calming breath starts with an inhale of 2 and an exhale of 4, with a 1 count pause in-between. Now you try:

– To begin, find a comfortable but tall sitting position & close your eyes.
– Inhale through your nose for a count of two.
– Hold the breath for a count of one.
– Exhale through your mouth for a count of four.
– Hold the breath for a count of one.
– Repeat the above for about 5 minutes.

If you want to extend your exhale, go for it. But remember to keep your breath slow and controlled and calm. If you feel any tension or anxiety, try a shorter breath. And if you would rather breath through your mouth the whole time, thats a-ok too.

Here’s to better breathing and a lot less stress in our future,
Jenn

Self care seems to be a buzz word lately, but sometimes we need a reminder to press pause and allow ourselves some recovery time. We all have busy, sometimes over-scheduled lives where we try to balance the needs of spouses, children, aging parents, work, finances and day-to-day life. That leaves little time for us as individuals. My life has slowed down in recent years as my children have grown older and my husband has retired and is around more to help – maybe around a little too much…but I remember (somewhat foggily) the multi-tasking days of just a few years ago. I was working full-time as a journalist, raising three young children, living abroad in a very foreign land, trying to take care of my 85 year-old mother who was thousands of miles away, grocery shopping online during my lunch hour and occasionally working out at the gym when I was not too exhausted. I didn’t take much time for myself during those years and they went by in a blur. The time I did take for myself was probably more Merlot than meditation.

As I’ve had more time to focus on myself, I’ve discovered what helps me relax and gives my body a chance to recover from life’s stressors. Let’s talk about baths. I am a bath aficionado. I love my epsom salt baths, bubble baths or simply sitting in the hot tub after a ski. I light the candles, put on some soft music and lock the door. Sometimes the bath is the only place that mothers can be left alone, maybe that’s where my affinity for baths started.

I’ve written before about another kind of bathing, forest bathing or Shinrin yoku (the term originated in Japan). Just taking a walk through a forest, breathing in the air and soaking in the energy of the trees can be incredibly restorative. “Indoors, we tend to use only two senses, our eyes and our ears. Outside is where we can smell the flowers, taste the fresh air, look at the changing colours of the trees, hear the birds singing and feel the breeze on our skin. And when we open up our senses, we begin to connect to the natural world.” (Dr. Qing Li)

The last type of bath I want to talk to you about is the sound bath, where instead of being immersed in water, your body is immersed in sound waves. One of the things that helps me meditate is listening to meditation music. I find it really helps me to zone out when I hear a particular frequency. It feels like the music is washing over my brain and cleansing it. I’ve discovered certain frequencies such as 528 hz (the vibration of love) are particularly effective. If you search Google or Spotify you can find a huge variety of “sound bath” playlists. The songs include sounds from chimes, gongs, drums and Himalayan singing bowls. Our bodies are made up of energy so it makes sense that being immersed in calming waves of sound could help shift our vibration and lower our stress levels. Sound has been used for thousands of years to heal and restore our bodies. While playlists are very helpful, listening to the music live allows the sound to be felt more deeply in our cells. There are more and more places offering sound baths as they become more popular. A simple search of “sound bath near me” will yield many results. Locally, we have access to reiki practitioner Laura Joseph. Laura is a metaphysical and holistic practitioner and teacher. She offers regular Reiki Vibrational Healing Meditations on the third Monday of the month at her studio in Hingham.

Laura uses a variety of instruments including Tibetan Singing Bowls. She says they have been used by Tibetan monks for centuries for healing and meditation purposes. “These bowls create a range of sounds to restore the normal vibratory frequencies of diseased and out-of-harmony parts of the body, mind and soul.”

“If we accept that sound is vibration and we know that vibration touches every part of our physical being, then we understand that sound is heard not only through our ears but through every cell in our bodies. One reason sound heals on a physical level is because it so deeply touches and transforms us on the emotional and spiritual planes. Sound can redress imbalances on every level of physiologic functioning and can play a positive role in the treatment of virtually any medical disorder.” (Dr. Mitchell Gaynor, director of Medical Oncology and Integrative Medicine, the Cornell Cancer Prevention Center in New York)

As poet Sylvia Plath says, “There must be quite a few things a hot bath won’t cure, but I don’t know many of them. Whenever I’m sad, I’m going to die, or so nervous I can’t sleep, or in love with somebody I won’t be seeing for a week, I slump down just so far and then I say: “I’ll go take a hot (or forest or sound…) bath”.

Computers, tablets, multiple cell phones. Like so many Americans I am constantly surrounded by technology. Work demands it.

Off days are never truly off days. The weather never sleeps.

New computer model data flows in multiple times a day. Viewer reports and questions stream in constantly on social media.

For me, getting away from that is top of mind when it comes to self-care.

There are a couple ways I do that, none of them fancy, and all of them involving nature.

For starters, I love taking a walk through the woods. I live very near the Stony Brook Reservation, and I’ll regularly pick a trail to follow on a nice day. I really like just being in a spot where it’s quiet. I enjoy poking around on the forest floor, or walking along a small stream, taking note of what’s blooming and which critters are running around.

It helps me keep things in check, preventing me from getting too carried away with what’s going on in a virtual world of Twitter or Instagram.

And I think it actually makes me a better meteorologist. Looking at what’s happening in a pond, or with leaves on a tree, can sometimes reveal just as much as a computer model.

Any day that’s sunny or dry is a day to walk in the woods. Perhaps a rare, sunny February day that’s 50 degrees. A spring day as the ice starts to melt on the ponds, and flowers pop for the first time of the season. Summer hikes offer cooling shade and a flurry of activity from insects of all kinds. And of course fall brings the splendor of foliage, one of my favorite times to be around nature.

When I’m not in Boston, I very often find myself in Hingham. And if that’s the case I substitute a walk in the woods for a paddle around the Harbor.

Kayaking is another great way to get away from the virtual pulls of daily life, either heading to one of the Boston Harbor Islands to explore or just floating around listening to the gentle lapping of the waves.

Then, of course, there are the occasions in the year where I get to combine my love of nature with my other love of travel.

When I go away I try to keep my phone on airplane mode as much as possible, taking in the sights and sounds of a new place without the bothers of home.

In each of these cases, be it walking in the woods, paddling in the Harbor, or traveling with no cell service, I end up refreshed.

The stress of keeping up with notifications, or being on-call constantly, melts away.

Being connected all the time is bad for your brain, I’m convinced of it. And these moments to stop and (sometimes literally) smell the roses, is all the self-care I need to feel refreshed.

—
Michael Page, Meteorologist

Facebook, Twitter, Instagram: @MichaelPageWx

When I think about self care I used to think about all the ways to feed, fuel, nourish and maybe even pamper my body. What I was leaving out was my mind & soul. My mind and soul were craving the simple pleasures of satisfying myself instead of a family of 6. If you don’t take care of yourself you can’t take care of them, right?

Lately, the self care I have been practicing is actively participating, or not paritcipating, in the activities that fulfill me and only me. My family is the most important thing in my life. I feel very lucky to have a supportive husband and happy healthy children. At times, I push–ok too many times, I push for my family to experience things together. “Everyone in the car for the soccer game, lets watch the same movie, head outside to play, etc.” Wether it’s an activity that I enjoy, my spouse enjoys or something we feel we “should do”, I have learned is that it is ok to not experience everything as a unit. Don’t get me wrong, we do plenty together and enjoy it! But we are all different beings and I firmly believe it is our differences that make us beautiful. What brings me joy, may not bring my husband, or children joy. But allowing ourselves to consistently seek out and make time for our own hobbies and interests not only feeds our soul but sets an example for others to engage in their own satisfaction as well.

I’ve been testing this experiment over the last few months. For example I really love a good excuse to dress up, leave the house, meet old & new friends, you know adult playdates. My husband travels for work and often times is away when the invite arrives or has just returned home and he is craving some downtime. The old me would have gently pressured (some may say guilted) him into attending with me, or stayed home if he was out of town. The result, happy campers are rarely happy when forced to camp. Instead I’m actively accepting and making plans where it fits, naturally.

We can at times feel like we have zero time in the day but practicing self care can take minutes, even moments if we prioritize. Here’s hoping you seek out the things you love to do and that you make time for them. Or politely refrain from the things that you do not enjoy and respecting others right to do so as well.

Photo credit: Alyssa Fortin Photography

When I hear the words “self care” my mind drifts to thoughts of luxurious spa treatments, relaxing salt baths, hot yoga sessions, and free time soaking in nature. And, while I love all of those things I am also a workaholic balancing my family and my business, both of which I love passionately. Carving out days or even hours to regularly enjoy these expressions of self care feels unrealistic. So, I practice a simpler form of self care that I can incorporate into every day, and that’s doing my best to speak to myself with love, acceptance, and kindness.

As a portrait photographer, I always begin by asking my clients “What is it that you love most about yourself that you would like me to capture today?” And, often the response sounds something like “Well, I really hate my [insert perceived physical flaw here], so I definitely want you to hide that.” And, that’s ok! My studio is a safe, open, and completely judgement-free space where people are encouraged to express themselves with honesty and authenticity. Most of us have things we haven’t accepted about our appearance, and my magic is in capturing the most beautiful version of my subjects, drawing out the things they love about the way they look. But, imagine how much happier, healthier, and lighter we can feel in our everyday lives when we really focus our attention on appreciating the things we LOVE about ourselves. It gives me so much joy and power when people say “I love my hair so I really want to show that off.” Or, “I love my eyes when I smile. Let’s get lots of smiling shots.”

Our own inner voices often include criticism we would never direct towards someone else. So, why do we think about ourselves that way? My personal commitment to self care is doing my best to show myself the same love, acceptance, and kindness that I give to my clients, my family, and my friends. When I look in the mirror, I make a genuine effort to see and appreciate the things I really love.

Running. It’s just GOOD for MY soul. Picture this, the sun not even up, it’s crisp (or freezing) out and I stick my headphones in and head out on a run. The run varies, could be 5-8-10 or 20 miles(GULP). I’m training for my first Boston Marathon to benefit The Martin Richard Foundation. When I first head out, I’m praying I don’t see coyotes. I’m not kidding, I hope I get to sunrise alive, LOL.

Hitting the pavement before the sun comes up is something only those that do, appreciate. The early bird gets the worm. There are parts of Hingham that I will run to so I can catch the sunrise. The most BEAUTIFUL sunrise. I always stop, snap a pic and thank GOD for the beautiful day. Running, as it does for many, allows me to clear my head or work through tough stuff. I usually will review my work notebook before I head out on a run, so I can work through my “list”. It helps me focus. It helps me solve things. Running is something that starting each day with allows for me to become a stronger person. If you have the chance, set your alarm for 30 min earlier than you are used to…lace up those sneakers and step outside into the CRISP winter(ish) air and take a deep breath. I can promise you one thing, you will not regret it (and just watch out for the Coyotes) If you’re not a runner, that doesn’t matter, walks are just as good. Grab a friend, bring a coffee. It’s all good for the soul and after all, time, fresh air and some movement and a stunning sunrise are all we need.

Life is good. Go get it.

-Erin Childs
President, boloco, & CK Community Rock Star

I started 2020 with a new intention this year. To stick to a morning routine. Like most ( or probably all) of you- my life is crazy. Juggling a family, a business, a home, pets, & commitments up the wazoo – the list goes on and on. I was gaining anxiety and waking up through the middle of the night worrying about the responsibilities of the following day. I would wake up rushed, frantic and anxious trying to get everything done for everybody before we all got out the door. I dreaded mornings.

My resolution for 2020 was to make a change. I implemented a morning routine for myself – and it has become such an important part of my day. I set my alarm to wake up earlier than my toddlers, husband, and dog (trust me, this did take some getting used to) and creep downstairs.

My first step is to make a cup of hot lemon water. This is a new daily tradition for me and I don’t think I can ever look back. Not only does hot lemon water energize and wake you up, it also boosts your mood, daily digestion, immune system – among so many other benefits.

While sipping my hot lemon water in the quiet (having small children this is the biggest blessing of waking up early), I write in my daily gratitude journal. Starting my day out with grateful and positive thoughts has worked wonders on my anxiousness and negative thoughts. These positive and grateful thoughts mean so much more when you write them down and will carry with you throughout the day. I then take 5-10 minutes to either reflect or do a short guided meditation (I find mine on the Calm app or even YouTube) to center myself for the day ahead.

Just taking this quick 10-20 minutes every morning to myself has become my most beloved self-care routine. I now go to bed and look forward to my morning routine, instead of going to bed anxious or stressed. I have noticed I stay more calm not only in the mornings, but throughout my entire day as well from implementing this small change in my life.

If you don’t currently have a morning routine, I challenge you to create one. Wake up early, have some warm lemon water, write out your grateful thoughts and do something that is just for you .

We head to work early at CK which works for me because I love my morning and having a few minutes of quiet before the house wakes up and things get busy. After grabbing a cup of coffee and a glass of water with juice from a squeezed lemon, I turn on the gas fireplace and wake up my body by stretching and rolling.

It only takes 10 minutes and it gets all the aches out and helps me feel energized and ready to start the day!

– Barbara Dalimonte, CK Kitchen Team Member